


Words hidden in silence

by hakubo



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Episode Tag, First Kiss, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Transformation, hurt comfort bingo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-08
Updated: 2015-12-08
Packaged: 2018-05-05 16:23:57
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5381954
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hakubo/pseuds/hakubo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Sheppard finally does wake up, Rodney's not even there, Teyla is, which is good. Teyla is the perfect person to have around when waking up from a medically induced coma after nearly becoming a bug person and Rodney is so fucking jealous he could scream.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Words hidden in silence

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Shaddyr](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shaddyr/gifts).



> Shaddyr, I had so much fun writing this for you and your prompts were so awesome I had a hard time deciding what to settle on. But you said bug John would please you the most, so. Hope your holidays are amazing!!
> 
> Written for my hc_bingo card "wild card - transformation"

After the first day Teyla, Ronon and him work out a rotation so that Sheppard is never alone. Rodney and Sheppard spend their time in silence; Sheppard because he's asleep and Rodney because, well. He's talk. He'd talk through all the minutes he spends at Sheppard's bedside but he can't. He's perfectly capable of being quiet when he has to or wants to. He simply doesn't want to most of the time. But this is different. This is him afraid – no, make that terrified – that once he starts talking he won't be able to stop. And the infirmary is hardly a private place, so anyone could overhear, but it's Sheppard overhearing that scares him the most so he focuses on the datapad in his hands and fixing the multitude of problems Atlantis has on offer and doesn't talk.

*

When Sheppard finally does wake up, Rodney's not even there, Teyla is, which is good. Teyla is the perfect person to have around when waking up from a medically induced coma after nearly becoming a bug person and Rodney is so fucking jealous he could scream. He does the next best thing, eviscerating his minions until Zelenka throws him out. He buries himself in work and ignores Teyla's looks that started concerned and turned angry as days passed.

Ronon is much less subtle – which is much easier to handle, he understands lack of subtlety – he just grabs Rodney by the jacket and pulls him along to the infirmary then just leaves him there with a threatening look. Rodney swallows hard, for the first time scared of Sheppard than Ronon, but of course, Sheppard is asleep.

But this time Rodney doesn't look away, focuses all his attention on John instead of everything else. The coloration on his face is almost gone, just little traces of blue on the edge of his jaw but he's beautiful, even like this, all bug-like and terrifying. He remembers the speed with which he moved when they chased him around Atlantis, the grace and focus that is Sheppard but seemed to be amplified with the change. How even changed he didn't really hurt anyone.

Rodney sits in the chair by the bed and stares at Jo – Sheppard's hands, scary with the – is it claws? Really long fingernails? – but still looking fragile- he doesn't dare touching so he doesn't wake him, but he moves closer and lays his head on the bed, listens to Jo – Sheppard breathe and stares at the blue-gray hand until he can no longer keep his eyes open.

*

“Don't wake him doc. He hasn't been sleeping.”

“Aye. But I need to make sure –“

“Have there been any reasons for concern in the past few days?” And that's Elizabeth, rodney focuses on keeping himself still and lets the words float around him, like they don't concern him at all.

“Of course not. I would have informed you immediately.”

“Then there's no reason not to let him sleep.”

“I suppose not.”

“We'll come back later, John.”

“Sure.”

Rodney doesn't move from his position even though everything hurts from sleeping hunched over. But John's hand is on the back of his neck , traces abstract shapes on his skin, makes him shiver. He keeps his eyes closed, enjoys it while he can because if John knew he's awake he's stop and Rodney's pathetic enough to take anything he can get.

That theory gets disapproved when the hand on his neck tightens, the barest hint of fingernails and Sheppard's voice breaks the silence.

“Hey Rodney.”

Rodney twitches so violently he almost falls out of his chair, but Sheppard's hand on his neck steadies him, firm and when he opens his eyes Sheppard's staring at him, those weird eyes calm and focused but making it impossible to guess at what's going through Sheppard's head. Not that he can usually guess, but things have been additionally unsteady since Doranda. They stay frozen like that for a long moment, staring at each other and Rodney on the verge of a panic attack, but then Sheppard's thumb moves, a slow, gentle caress that makes Rodney shiver and want to close his eyes.

He doesn't, stares at Sheppard's lips and licks his own to get them wet and Sheppard's focus switches from Rodney's eyes to his lips and Rodney has to close his eyes for just a moment. His entire body is hyperfocused on that single point of contact and the maddening movement of John's thumb.

Rodney opens his eyes and focuses on John's lips, pink and wet, and allows himself to want.

“John?”

“Yeah, Rodney,” John rasps. It's a confirmation, not a question that Rodney's been dreading so he jerks to his feet, hisses in pain when every part of his body stages a painful rebellion and dislodges John's hand in the process. He steps closer, leans in and presses their lips together, dry and chaste, with his eyes wide open and seeing nothing but John.

Then both John's hands are framing his face and the kiss is anything but chaste, John's tongue licking at his lips, not waiting on permission before pressing in. Rodney can't help but moan, though he manages to keep it quiet, presses closer and breathes in the scent of the infirmary and underneath it John. The kiss ends slowly, with a shared breath and easy slide of lips. Rodney opens his eyes and smiles at John before he tries to move and everything just hurts.

“Oh my god. ow. Do you realize that this means vertebrae damage, right? Because if I have to let Zelenka and the morons they call scientists at the SGC these days take care of Atlantis because I'm in the infirmary wi –“ Rodney tries to keep talking until his brain catches up to the fact that he's being kissed and he kisses back. It's quick and dirty and John gives him a private, honest smile when all he can do and stare, his beautiful brain reduced to nothing but white noise.

“Well, then you's keep me company,” John drawls and it takes Rodney an embarrassing moment to remember what the hell John is talking about before he nods.

“Yes. Yes, I would.”

Carson shows up just then and Rodney takes that as a signal to leave. He gives John a smile and an awkward wave behind Carson's back. John waves back with a “See ya, Rodney,” and Rodney goes, humming under his breath.


End file.
